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In the middle of the heat of a great song, they're dancing up a storm. They look incredible out there. His style very chivalrous, her style, very elegant. A small crowd gathers to watch them dance. Suddenly, he dances in front of her, grabs her by the hips, kneels down and just inches away from her crotch, starts shaking his face and tongue back and forth. The crowd is shocked. Their smiles fade, and they look at each other, hands on their mouths, and start shaking their heads in a negative way. Some hide their eyes or look away. What was once a great performance, has now turned into an appalling gutter dance.

They forget how well they danced... they only remember what he did to her.

She's not his wife, she's not his fiancé, she's just some girl innocently looking down at him, completely shocked at what he's doing. She is stunned... she looks at him, tries to turn the other way, she gives a slight scream, tries to laugh it off a little, but deep down is mortified at what he just did to her.

He's a great dancer, but... why did he have to do that? What sort of skill did that require? Some guys get so swelled up with being "awesome leads", that the "fame" gets to their heads. They think they can get away with any sort of sexual expression now, and will stop at nothing to get their faces near a woman's crotch on the dance floor.

The same goes for "butt dancing". This where the guy places the woman in front of him, bends her over, and rubs his groin on her backside.It's even worse when the woman is rubbing her backside or crotch on the man's groin.

This behavior is NOT dancing. It is uncalled for, and should NEVER be done in the dance scene.

Ladies, remember, you don't have to put up with this. Just because he's leading you into a nasty move, does not mean you have to participate in it, nor have to try and shrug it off like it was nothing.

Gentlemen, believe it or not, ladies "do not" particularly enjoy this. Their smiles are EMBARRASSMENT coming through in the only way they know how. They've emailed me, and told me on countless occasions that this type of behavior is terrible, but they don't know how to deal with it at that split second moment of time. What do they do?

Any type of behavior like this is considered low-life and downright trashy. It does not belong in the Classy Salsa scene, and should stay out. If you see this type of behavior by men on the dance floor, stop at that moment, shake your head and finger "No.", then finish up the dance. If they persist, walk off the dance floor. You don't need to subject yourself to that type of trashy dancing. What's the point? You've come to have fun, not to be some sort of object of sexual expression for these guys.

If you notice your partner going to that area of your crotch, turn the other way, back off, or simply say "No!". If he persists, grab his hair, and pull him back up. You shouldn't have to put up with that. This type of "move" is completely uncalled for, and extremely inappropriate behavior on the dance floor.

Guys, your tongue should ALWAYS stay where it belongs - IN YOUR MOUTH, closed shut. If you "pretend" to be licking her, then you are putting both of yourselves down. People are watching. They don't appreciate being witness to this, and their level of respect for you will plummet.

Trust me, spectators see everything. They talk. And when they see this trash, they'll TALK TRASH about YOU. I've seen it happen, first-hand.

This goes for women as well. Trashy dancing, like rubbing your backside or crotch up and down his leg, makes you look just as cheap as the move itself. It will earn you just about as much respect as a whore downtown. Don't do it. Keep your dancing clean and fun. Don't risk your reputation on some stupid unnecessary move. It's not worth it.

I was showing this article to a world famous International instructor recently, and he told me that some women are just as bad, if not worse. He went on to say that on several occasions, the women would grab his balls in the middle of the song. He had to tell them "Stop!" Immediately he called her attention, and told her that if she ever did that again, he would never dance with her again. It's not good behavior for a lady. "We try to respect the ladies out there. If we are faced with that type of behavior, who will respect them?"

Respect yourselves, respect each other. Keep the Salsa dance scene a classy one. Give Salsa the respect it deserves.

Keep Salsa clean.

Edie, The Salsa FREAK